Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Rockford Pages Poet Gets Shiny New Teeth

Outsider poet Thomas L. Vaultonburg recently got some shiny new teeth. At least on line he did. As was pointed out by his father thirty-five years ago, there's no point fixing your teeth because someone is just going to knock them out, anyway. Which as a prediction didn't turn out to be as bad as others, but thirty five years later an amazing advance in human technology called dentistry allows me to actually get thirty years of neglect repaired. At least semi-repaired.

After two years of dental work I expect to look like this 

And when that happens I intend to run for public office.

But before that the 2017 Outsider Poetry Slam League of America season. I was originally traded to Chemung, as my mother always told me I would be, but have become a free agent and will be competing for the Rockford Pages.

It gets dark and rains again as I write, and in a half hour I will do my final fantasy football draft of the season. Something on the right side of my body hurts a little more than I think it should, but I'm so sick of medical procedures I'm putting off having it checked out in hopes that it's something I have two of. 

My teeth never looked like that. They started getting knocked out early and often, and at this late date I'm just happy to have what I have left. This is the first opportunity after decades of service jobs to get them fixed. 

Poetry. Fantasy football. We may be getting a dog this Fall. I have no idea what kind I'd even like. But it will be nice to have a dog around again. 

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